I always hope that there are some about me but frankly, I don't think I would recognize them even if they were. Even now, there's one posted where a man apologizes for not offering his seat to a "shivering girl" at the Germany Embassy last week. I was at the Germany Embassy and I was certainly shivering and in need of seat. Was it me or one of the other 2000 girls you saw that day? Same to the boy looking for the girl he made eye contact with on the metro escalator....or girl in the checkout line at Homegoods...or...you see how long this can go on...
I think we've all had those moments...where you saw someone and your heart skipped a beat but rather than immediately share that information with the handsome stranger, you needed a few minutes to process it, to come up with a game plan, to strategize, to make yourself sound cool and calm...and then the moment is gone.This feeling of lost romance is ultimately what intrigued me about the dating app Happn. The app, which uses your GPS, tracks your movements throughout the day and then pulls up profiles of other Happn users with whom you've crossed paths. It then operates very similarly to Tinder/Hinge/Bumble where you swipe right if interested and swipe left if not. Also, in case they seem familiar, you can see how many times your paths have crossed and where these instances occurred. It sounds magical, right? Now the boy who held open the elevator door for you can actually find you! Or the sweet guy who asked for directions? You can see if he managed to find the Capital building! The possibilities just seem so...hopeful! It's the antithesis of a depressing morning with my coffee and the Craigslist missed connections.
And folks, I want this to work so very badly. It seems like the one outlet that merges fate and old-fashioned "meet cutes" with modern technology.
However, the reality is that this app seems to cause just as much angst as it does hope. For example, when I'm at the gym and I get notifications that people are sending "charms" through Happn I freak out. Seriously, panic. I have on no make-up, my hair is so gross and I've been panting in this Zumba class for 45 minutes. ARE YOU WATCHING ME?!
I was also recently on the metro and using the time to swipe right or left on the variety of dating apps on my phone and while using Happn, I was "matched" with a boy who was "less than 850 feet away." He was cute and I wondered if I had just missed him, had he been at the platform we just left? I hit refresh, and then refresh again, and again, and every time, this boy was 850 feet away from me. That's when it hit me, he was on this metro car with me. I instantly panicked. What if he was looking at the app too? What if he was watching me look at the app right now? It was just too much!
I'm not quite sure what this says about my need for balance between a "natural" meeting and my compulsive need to analyze his pictures, friends, and profile tagline before making a decision about him, but it's just not working out at this point. Maybe I now place more value on the system in place..the box checking, friend approved, minimally invested "swipe" than I do on meeting an actual human in the actual world...
and that makes me kind of sad...
If you're like me, the idea of the Happn App is pretty terrifying. I'm sure some of you read that and were thinking "Nope." I'm with you....so the Happn world is one that Holly has had to go alone.
I think Holly's hesitancy with Hinge speaks to a bigger issue urged on by dating apps/websites. There's SO much build up and preparation before meeting a person for the first time that you feel like you can ONLY meet new people when you're physically prepared for it. It has created this dynamic in dating where people have to put their best foot forward (showered, cute-effortless-outfit-that-probably-took-you-3-trips-to-nordstrom-rack-to-put-together, zit-less, probably smelling nice, having practiced a few conversation topics, and yadda yadda), or else they don't feel confident going into the date. In the REALLLL world, we meet new people all of the time! Sometimes I even meet new people when I have my hair in a pony tail and have leggings on, but *GASP!*I couldn't imagine meeting someone romantically when I'm in that mode. The challenge with Happn is that you may match with someone while you're in that mode...and that just doesn't bode well for me. Whatever....I'm rambling..
So, I haven't entered the Happn world, but I've continued on the Hinge and Bumble world. (Those are apps you've read about here before...) I've met some pretty awesome guys through Bumble, but everything on Hinge dies out pretty quickly.
I had a date somewhat recently that just kinda made me sad. He seemed like a sweet and well-intentioned guy, but I was so bored through the date that I found myself COUNTING FLOWER PETALS ON A FLOWER BEHIND HIM. I snapped out of it when I saw a bug flying behind him and I flinched, which probably gave it away to him that I was totally zoned out. That whole bit probably speaks more to the fact that I'm a jerk, rather than him being boring..but..yeah..whatever..the coffee was good, at least.
I'm going to end my rambling now because I just watched two chihuahuas get custom wedding dresses and then get married on TLC's Say Yes to The Dress, so I'm emotionally ready for a bucket of ice cream. Or two.Hugs and frogs,
Holly & Heather
